As a bride-to-be you know that planning a wedding is not all champagne and flowers. Getting engaged also means saying “yes” to a part time job as wedding planner, event co-ordinator, family mediator and stylist – even if these roles aren’t a natural part of your skill set.

While you may enjoy the wedding planning process, it’s still hard work and during the first few months of your engagement you will feel as though you are being pulled in a million different directions. There are many big decisions to be made and suddenly everyone has a question, an opinion or a request. This time can leave you feeling overwhelmed, under prepared and in need of a little ‘me time’.

Women have a tendency to look after others before themselves. It’s in our nature to nurture and satisfy. Your engagement period is meant to be about nurturing your relationship with your future husband as you prepare to build a life together, not prioritizing Aunt Nelly’s demands for a plus one.

Being a fiancee is just as important as being a girlfriend and being a wife. An engagement is not just a time to save for and plan your wedding; rather it’s an exciting stage in your relationship where you plant seeds for your future, reflect on your past and live in the moment.

Connecting to your heart on a daily basis is a great practice to manage the pressures of wedding planning. The simple action of putting your hand over your heart gently reminds you that your heart is your center, it is your body’s innate intelligence and knows the truth of who you are and what you desire. This practice will help slow things down and remind you of what’s important.

Connect with your heart

• Place your hand over your heart, palm open and eyes closed.
• Imagine your heart expanding underneath your palm and filling up your chest.
• Notice the beating of your heart beneath your hand.
• Once you connect to your heart, send your breath there. Breath in and out and visualize your heart filling and softening with your breath.
• Allow your mind to soften and clear as you count the breaths for 10 inhales and 10 exhales.
• Release your hand and open your eyes.

I encourage you to connect with your heart at any time during the day whenever you need to feel centered. When someone requests that you ‘do’ something or wants to comment and critique decisions that you are making, take a moment to ask yourself ‘will this nourish me or will this deplete me’?

Pay attention to those times during your engagement where you sacrifice your desires for those of another. Remind yourself that you are not responsible for creating a wedding experience that makes other people happy. Their reactions and opinions are their own just as your wedding wishes are yours.

The more you are willing to practice observing and listening to what you want this special time to be, the more effortless it will become to make those desires a reality.

Now consider how connecting with your heart could benefit your engagement. What part of the wedding planning process is the most draining for you and how could this exercise help to improve that situation? I would love to hear your answers in the comments below. 

Yours with love and light,

Jennifer Dene xx

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